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Thread: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

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    John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Disclaimer: The following thread is for comedic purposes only. It's sole intention is to bring laughter and smiles to all members of the WrestlingClique forums and is in no way supposed to be taken seriously. It is my hope that my sense of humor will give you a chuckle and maybe give your day a little light.

    And if not, then I'm sure one of the mods or admins will let me know and shut down the thread.

    So anyway...let's begin!

    Opening Statement

    John Cena.

    From fresh-faced nobody to rapping Doctor of Thuganomics to the Commander in Chief of the Cenation, WWE's ever-stalwart figurehead has always portrayed himself as the white knight, the man who always does what's right and never compromises his beliefs...

    OR DOES HE?!

    Yes, despite what the WWE would have you believe, John Cena is a despicable monster who does nothing but ruin lives of everybody he's ever come into contact with. Sure, at one time even I believed that he was a good man and a fine face for the company, but no longer! My eyes are wide open and see the Truth for what it is, and I feel that it is my duty and obligation to share this Truth with all of you. As we move forward, I will be presenting evidence of John Cena's heinous and reprehensible actions to show every wrestling fan who's ever logged onto this site "The Champ's" true nature.

    I must warn you though...some of what you are about to see and hear is very graphic. Viewer and reader discretion is advised.

    Exhibit A: Zack Ryder

    The most recent of John Cena's victims is by far his most aggregious of sins. Here you have Zack Ryder, a young man who managed to get himself a fan base without the backing of the WWE Universe and even managed to secure and win the prestigious United States Championship. So what does John Cena, the supposed "Paragon" of the WWE do?



    Now, on the surface, it just looks like John's showing support for his friend, but in reality he is clearly trying to get the rub off of Zack Ryder's recent success. Which is an act of pure egotism, since John's already the top guy on the brand!

    But ignoring that for a second, let us talk about John's recent skirmishes with the Big Red Monster, Kane, who is attempting to get John to stop pretending and embrace his true self (a noble cause if ever I've seen one). But Kane, regardless of his intents, is a monster and therefore cannot be blamed for his actions as they are in his nature. But John, instead of bringing the fight directly to Kane, instead gets his "friends" involved in his wars:





    This would continue on for weeks, as John would consistently put Zack Ryder and the woman he loves, Eve Torres, into danger every single Monday Night Raw. Zack's injuries due to John's actions would play a huge part in Zack's loss of the US Title, and due to the severity of the injuries inflicted by Kane as a message to Cena, Ryder's very career is now in serious question.

    But oh, it doesn't end there, my friends! For Cena would commit even greater atrocities to poor Zack Ryder...



    Yes, my friends...John Cena kisses (and by transitive property, steals) Zack Ryder's beloved. What kind of man...a married man...would do that to his supposed friend? I'll tell you...a heartless bastard who wants nothing but to take any joy out of other people's lives! But even that wasn't low enough for Cena...oh, no!



    Your eyes don't deceive you. That is, in fact, John Cena threatening to inflict physical violence on a clearly crippled human being. But it turns out that just being near John Cena is poisonous, as Kane would be the vessel that further injured what was once a promising young star.

    John Cena: adulterer, terrible friend, and now an accesory to assault and battery.

    I have more evidence to present at a later time, but perhaps there is someone delusional enough to defend this monster...
    Last edited by Cyrus T; 02-14-2012 at 04:53 PM. Reason: John Cena Causes Dyslexia
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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    dude what the hell are you talking about? Eve kissed Cena watch the video carefully, and Cena pulled her after 2-3 secs, being a real man, ofcourse u would take 2-3 secs to pull away a sexy girl like Eve

    and he did not lay his hands on Ryder, which he should have done, I dont see how you can call Cena a monster frankly

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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Does this mean The Hate finally debuted last night?


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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Quote Originally Posted by heel316 View Post
    dude what the hell are you talking about? Eve kissed Cena watch the video carefully, and Cena pulled her after 2-3 secs, being a real man, ofcourse u would take 2-3 secs to pull away a sexy girl like Eve

    and he did not lay his hands on Ryder, which he should have done, I dont see how you can call Cena a monster frankly
    It's rather simple really. I don't know whether you've realize this or not, but Eve is rather unintelligent. In fact, and pardon my crassness, but Eve's rock-stupid. I've seen slasher victims with more intelligence than her. She clearly was overcome with emotions and did something stupid (which is in her nature) by kissing Cena. And Cena certainly wasn't angry at Eve for kissing him...he clearly wanted her to! There was no moral outrage, and how does he apologize to Zack Ryder?

    By threatening him with bodily harm! And I remind you, Zack was at the time two steps away from crippled.

    And as far as him not physically harming Zack...your point is well taken. HOWEVER! John knew he didn't have to. What has been the modus operandi of Kane the last few weeks?

    1) Wait until Zack interacts with Cena
    2) Get hands on Zack
    3) Injure Zack

    John is not a stupid man...he can certainly see the pattern. But he willfully ignores this, because he knows Kane will do the dirty work and hurt Zack Ryder for him! So he never directly hurt him...but his inactivity caused irreversable harm.

    It's said that tyranny exists when good men do nothing. Well, John Cena's done a whole lot of nothing.
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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Quote Originally Posted by Marketh View Post
    Does this mean The Hate finally debuted last night?
    Well, yes and no. Last night's Raw was definitely the best sign we've had that John Cena's a rotten human being. But as I'll show later, there has been evidence of his monstrous ways in the past as well.
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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    u have opened my eyes, all my life i was idolising a hypocrite, neophyte gelatinous tapeworm who thrived on hurting and destroying others and their careers to benefit himself

    now i understand what "you cant see me" means, i could not see his real evil face behind the good guy acting Cena does all these years, he was mocking us stupid gullible fans who loved him

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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Quote Originally Posted by heel316 View Post
    u have opened my eyes, all my life i was idolising a hypocrite, neophyte gelatinous tapeworm who thrived on hurting and destroying others and their careers to benefit himself

    now i understand what "you cant see me" means, i could not see his real evil face behind the good guy acting Cena does all these years, he was mocking us stupid gullible fans who loved him
    It's all right...even I was fooled at first, but I saw through the veil of deceit. There is always hope, though...there is always hope.
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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Cena also took his shirt off in the middle of that promo, trying to attract even more women Ryder wouldn't be able to get because of his injury, right in front of Ryder's face.


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    #3. Adam Cole vs. Jay Briscoe - Ladder War V
    #4. Adam Cole vs. Kevin Steen - Global Wars
    #5. Adam Cole vs. Chris Hero - 12th Anniversary Show

    Spoiler:

    #6. Tommaso Ciampa vs. Hanson - 12th Anniversary Show
    #7. Kevin Steen & The Young Bucks vs. Michael Elgin & The Briscoes - Raising the Bar - Night 1
    #8. Michael Elgin vs. Kevin Steen - Supercard of Honor VIII
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    #10. The Young Bucks vs. Forever Hooligans vs. The Time Splitters - Global Wars

    2014 Five Worst ROH Matches Ranking:
    #5. Bobby Fish vs. The Romantic Touch - The Road to Best In The World - Night 1
    #4. Brutal Burgers vs. RD Evans & Moose - Field Of Honor
    #3. The Romantic Touch vs. Caprice Coleman - State of the Art
    #2. Corey Hollis vs. Mike Posey - Top Prospect Tournament (Round 1)
    #1. Alex Reigns vs. Weezy Woo - State of the Art


    Quote Originally Posted by Dakstang
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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Quote Originally Posted by Marketh View Post
    Cena also took his shirt off in the middle of that promo, trying to attract even more women Ryder wouldn't be able to get because of his injury, right in front of Ryder's face.
    Does his depravity know no bounds?!
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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    It was said in the Live Discussion last night, but needless to say, I completely agree. John Cena is completely dispiccable, as is Eve, and Kane is almost a good guy in this whole situation: he's showing Ryder how ****ty John Cena really is. Come on, it's not like he's trying to push her away - and he must have seen the wheelchair bound, headband wearing goof rolling right next to him as he saved Eve.



    So yeah, Cena is an awful person, although nowhere near as terrible as Eve.

    Also, he didn't even try and help Ryder in the ring, instead letting the man struggle into the ring by himself.

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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    I'm just waiting for the end of this to find out that in kayfabe land only Eve and Cena see Kane. And we got all this Fight Club/Sixth Sense **** going on. No one seems to blame Kane at all for anything. Anything Kane does seems to be just be blamed on Cena.

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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Quote Originally Posted by Lghikas View Post
    I'm just waiting for the end of this to find out that in kayfabe land only Eve and Cena see Kane. And we got all this Fight Club/Sixth Sense **** going on. No one seems to blame Kane at all for anything. Anything Kane does seems to be just be blamed on Cena.
    Kane is a seven foot tall monster who can summon fire at will. Blaming him for mass devastation would be like blaming a lion for killing a weak gazelle. You can't fault Kane for doing what comes naturally.

    John Cena, being the fraud and soulless human being that he is, can be blamed for his relative inaction against such a dangerous adversary and getting Ryder involved in this whole mess.
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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    I always had a fishy feeling with Cena ever since I saw him. He seemed like a nice guy at first doing all these make a wish foundation trips and supporting the troops, but i knew from the day i saw this prick, that he was hidding something. His true intentions on stealing the hearts of tweens and poor innocent children everywhere and making this "CenaNation" in order to make child soldiers in order to rule the world. The sick bastard has no ends to satisfy himself. I guess "You Cant See Me" actually does mean that we cant see his true persona.

    Damint im pissed now

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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Quote Originally Posted by Lghikas View Post
    No one seems to blame Kane at all for anything. Anything Kane does seems to be just be blamed on Cena.
    It all makes perfect sense now. Why would Kane return to attack Cena? It doesn't make any sense. Better yet, why would Kane come back with the mask? His career was nearly ended by Mark Henry, but all Kane cares about is getting Cena to embrace the hate. The truth is that Kane is still back at home, nursing his injured ankle. After years of trying to suppress the hate, the hate finally erupted into the form of another person in John Cena's mind. Obviously, Cena can't allow himself to realize that it's him, so he made the hate the single most evil guy he could think of - Masked Kane. This is the same guy that killed his parents, may have raped a dead girl and tried to kill his brother on live PPV. Masked Kane is the perfect scapegoat for Cena.

    Meanwhile, it also makes perfect sense why Cena isn't booked in the Rumble nor the Elimination Chamber. The guy is flat out nuts and everyone around him sees it. Johnny Ace couldn't live with himself if he booked a mentally disturbed victim in a serious match and he got hurt. So instead, Ace has been allowing Cena to continue living in this fantasy world by booking him in PPV matches against "Kane". In reality, it's just Cena bumping around the ring alone.

    It's only a matter of time before Kane removes his masked to be revealed as John Cena.

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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Quote Originally Posted by Jim View Post
    It all makes perfect sense now. Why would Kane return to attack Cena? It doesn't make any sense. Better yet, why would Kane come back with the mask? His career was nearly ended by Mark Henry, but all Kane cares about is getting Cena to embrace the hate. The truth is that Kane is still back at home, nursing his injured ankle. After years of trying to suppress the hate, the hate finally erupted into the form of another person in John Cena's mind. Obviously, Cena can't allow himself to realize that it's him, so he made the hate the single most evil guy he could think of - Masked Kane. This is the same guy that killed his parents, may have raped a dead girl and tried to kill his brother on live PPV. Masked Kane is the perfect scapegoat for Cena.

    Meanwhile, it also makes perfect sense why Cena isn't booked in the Rumble nor the Elimination Chamber. The guy is flat out nuts and everyone around him sees it. Johnny Ace couldn't live with himself if he booked a mentally disturbed victim in a serious match and he got hurt. So instead, Ace has been allowing Cena to continue living in this fantasy world by booking him in PPV matches against "Kane". In reality, it's just Cena bumping around the ring alone.

    It's only a matter of time before Kane removes his masked to be revealed as John Cena.
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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    What needs to happen, to carry on from Jim's post, is that the unmasked Kane confronts masked Cena-Kane. Thus we get the continuation of this epic feud:



    So after 6 years, we finally reveal that John Cena was behind the fake Kane character all along. Think about it, it wasn't long after Cena started getting booed a lot that the fake Kane character was born. He uses it to unleash his inner hate.

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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Those ideas are way too awesome for the WWE to consider. Shockmaster's is actually feasble, but they will never do that. The art of the swerve in WWE is dead.
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    Roll Tide...Because Charlie said so.

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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Exhibit B: Sheamus

    CM Punk once said that WWE's involvment in the Be A Star Anti-Bullying Campaign was a bit of a farce, especially considering that Vince McMahon was the biggest bully to professional wrestling. But you know who truly believes in Be A Star?

    This guy:



    Sure, he's a 275 pound human wrecking ball, but Sheamus has a kinder, gentler soul. You see, he was often bullied for his complexion and his red hair, not just by kids but even recently into his foray into pro wrestling and the WWE. But he's gone on record as saying that he truly believes that making fun of people for the way they talk, the way they look, or anything like that is wrong.

    But John Cena, the horrible horrible man that he is, doesn't quite see it that way.





    Yes, the man who proudly bears a "Be A Star" emblem on the shoulder of his "Rise Above Hate" T-shirt is just as big a bully as those he would condemn. Is it any wonder why Sheamus was acting out during his run on Raw with such mean-spirited, acidic verbal barbs?

    Fortunately, Sheamus has had plenty of time to heal as he's found great success over on Smackdown, away from John Cena. But maybe he wouldn't have had to make the move had John been just a little kinder to the Irishman.
    Last edited by Cyrus T; 02-14-2012 at 04:24 PM.
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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Quote Originally Posted by Jim View Post
    It all makes perfect sense now. Why would Kane return to attack Cena? It doesn't make any sense. Better yet, why would Kane come back with the mask? His career was nearly ended by Mark Henry, but all Kane cares about is getting Cena to embrace the hate. The truth is that Kane is still back at home, nursing his injured ankle. After years of trying to suppress the hate, the hate finally erupted into the form of another person in John Cena's mind. Obviously, Cena can't allow himself to realize that it's him, so he made the hate the single most evil guy he could think of - Masked Kane. This is the same guy that killed his parents, may have raped a dead girl and tried to kill his brother on live PPV. Masked Kane is the perfect scapegoat for Cena.

    Meanwhile, it also makes perfect sense why Cena isn't booked in the Rumble nor the Elimination Chamber. The guy is flat out nuts and everyone around him sees it. Johnny Ace couldn't live with himself if he booked a mentally disturbed victim in a serious match and he got hurt. So instead, Ace has been allowing Cena to continue living in this fantasy world by booking him in PPV matches against "Kane". In reality, it's just Cena bumping around the ring alone.

    It's only a matter of time before Kane removes his masked to be revealed as John Cena.
    YES! And I think someone in the Live discussion thread or somewhere said to bring back Tim White's suicide gimmick but with Ryder. So without Kane really being there Ryder's been kicking his ass himself, and it was Ryder who wheeled himself off the stage last night.

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    Re: John Cena is a Rotten Human Being

    Quote Originally Posted by Lghikas View Post
    YES! And I think someone in the Live discussion thread or somewhere said to bring back Tim White's suicide gimmick but with Ryder. So without Kane really being there Ryder's been kicking his ass himself, and it was Ryder who wheeled himself off the stage last night.
    No, Kane wheeled Ryder off of the stage. It was just that Cena was wearing the Kane mask. Thus Cena stole Zack's girl and then further continued to brutalize the poor guy.

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